Joey Wreck

about.me:
I am Joey. 18 years old. Born in New Orleans. I live in Ohio.

Today at work

  • *Woman approaches the register buying several small packages of lunch meat*
  • Me: Hey, how are you today ma'am?
  • Customer: Gonna use these to practice cutting his dick off.
  • Me: *looks at her husband for signs of nervousness*(I find none)
  • Customer: Yep, i'm gonna practice chopping his dick off.
  • Me: It's too bad lorena bobbit isnt around, you could ask her for advice.
  • Customer: You're the only nice one Jacob. You're the only normal one.
  • Me: Thanks ma'am, have a great day.
  • Customer: Yep, gonna practice cutting his dick right off
10knotes:

wordsthatmakeusmurderers:
IT LOOKS LIKE HE PHOTOSHOPPED THE HAT ON HIS HEAD AND I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING
OMG. I’M PRETTY SURE IT IS PHOTOSHOPPED. JUST LOOK AT THE SHADOW ON HIS HAT BUT LOOK AT HOW THE LIGHT SOURCE IS IN FRONT OF HIM AND THE DIRECTION OF THE SHADOWS IN THE BACKGROUND.
ALSO, GUESS WHAT I MANAGED TO FIND ON GOOGLE?

IT’S EVEN IN THE SAME ANGLE AND EVERYTHING. HE ACTUALLY PHOTOSHOPPED A HAT ON HIS HEAD. WHY OMFG.
hahahahahahah
AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAHAAHA 

10knotes:

wordsthatmakeusmurderers:

IT LOOKS LIKE HE PHOTOSHOPPED THE HAT ON HIS HEAD AND I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING

OMG. I’M PRETTY SURE IT IS PHOTOSHOPPED. JUST LOOK AT THE SHADOW ON HIS HAT BUT LOOK AT HOW THE LIGHT SOURCE IS IN FRONT OF HIM AND THE DIRECTION OF THE SHADOWS IN THE BACKGROUND.

ALSO, GUESS WHAT I MANAGED TO FIND ON GOOGLE?

image

IT’S EVEN IN THE SAME ANGLE AND EVERYTHING. HE ACTUALLY PHOTOSHOPPED A HAT ON HIS HEAD. WHY OMFG.

hahahahahahah

AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAHAAHA 

(Source: lavagoth)

This, from the New York Times, explains how a lot of Conservatives are a bunch of fools.

“Textbooks are mostly the product of the liberal establishment, and they’re written with the idea that our religion and our liberty are in conflict,” he said. “But Christianity has had a deep impact on our system. The men who wrote the Constitution were Christians who knew the Bible. Our idea of individual rights comes from the Bible. The Western development of the free-market system owes a lot to biblical principles.”

For [Don] McLeroy, separation of church and state is a myth perpetrated by secular liberals. “There are two basic facts about man,” he said. “He was created in the image of God, and he is fallen. You can’t appreciate the founding of our country without realizing that the founders understood that. For our kids to not know our history, that could kill a society. That’s why to me this is a huge thing.”

vickthebizzare:

aroihkin:

accobi:

beranyth:

prothy-the-prothean:

masterassassino:

doctorscottie:

ozolopolis:

xeruth:

pepsie:

theamericankid:

Gaming Logic

more you tilt your body your character will get away from danger

the louder you yell, the more critical hits you’ll land

when you stand up you can see everyone’s weakspots

when you tilt your head you’ll be able to see more of the area

When you lean forward, you get +30% concentration.

When you use controller 1, it means you’ll win

Throwing yourself bodily to the side helps you avoid obstacles in racing.

Threatening the playable character with physical injury will make platform puzzles easier.

All of these things. All of them.

Wait…but in some old ps2 games the buttons were pressure sensitive. You literally could mash the button and it would be harder.

The last two ruined it. “All of them” “Some were pressure sensitive” Get off the fucking internet, we had a good thing going.

vickthebizzare:

aroihkin:

accobi:

beranyth:

prothy-the-prothean:

masterassassino:

doctorscottie:

ozolopolis:

xeruth:

pepsie:

theamericankid:

Gaming Logic

more you tilt your body your character will get away from danger

the louder you yell, the more critical hits you’ll land

when you stand up you can see everyone’s weakspots

when you tilt your head you’ll be able to see more of the area

When you lean forward, you get +30% concentration.

When you use controller 1, it means you’ll win

Throwing yourself bodily to the side helps you avoid obstacles in racing.

Threatening the playable character with physical injury will make platform puzzles easier.

All of these things. All of them.

Wait…but in some old ps2 games the buttons were pressure sensitive. You literally could mash the button and it would be harder.

The last two ruined it. “All of them” “Some were pressure sensitive” Get off the fucking internet, we had a good thing going.

(via qorgon)

blasianxbri:

Have your daily laugh-gasm here!

lol

FUCK YOU IM NOT HAVING MY DAILY LAUGH GASM

WHO THE FUCK SAYS THAT?

"FOLLOW THIS FUCKING STUPIDASS BLOG AND YOULL LAUGH UNTIL YOUR SIDES HURT"

THIS IS FUNNY BUT IM NOT LAUGHING

WHOS LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY AT THIS SHIT?

YOU STUPID FUCKS 

(via mind-cleanse)